Newest Military Technology: Silly String

Actually a pretty cool idea. Apparently, they're using it find tripwires in building before they enter a room.

"Because it's light weight and it helps detect wires when they're going through a doorway without setting off the explosive ordinance,” said Jones.

You can see how the string gets hung up on wires that would otherwise be invisible to the naked eye, wires that could be connected to a bomb. And this is not something the military provides.

I love our troops' ingenuity. Oh, I forgot, they're all inbred retards, right John Kerry?

Quite Possibly The Most Unfortunate Toy Design. Ever.

There's really not a whole lot to say about this:

Except perhaps Mattel needs to do background checks on its designers.

EDIT: Looks like Amazon took the item off thier website.
Here's a picture of it.

Playstation 3 is Out. And People Lose Thier Minds.

OK, so the PS3 is out today. Big whoop, right? Well, if you're this guy, it's a (at the time of this posting) $24,000 whoop. That's right. $24,000 for a $600 game console that was already overpriced to begin with. Let that soak in for a minute.

Ready?

Here's a list of some of the craziness from this morning. Keep in mind, this is all over a GAME CONSOLE.

Read - Gunmen rob California store of PS3s in the nerdiest heist ever (ok, maybe the second nerdiest ever).
Read - 10 to 12 people robbed in PS3 line (dubious, but possible). [Via Digg]
Read - Sheriffs shut down another California store for rowdy behavior.
Read - Police break up NY SonyStyle store fight.
Read - Brawl breaks out at another Wally when manager plays musical PlayStation chairs. Seriously, what an idiot. [Thanks Kyle D.]
Read - Shots were apparently fired at a Texas Wally. Pics here and here of the 5-0. [Thanks, Jason]
Read - Two armed, masked robbers overtook a customer in Springfield. [Thanks, Jason]
Watch - North Fresno / Merced had stampede-riot insanity.

And even better, from Engadget:

We take it back, you want to be violent about the PS3? We've got a target for you: none other than former Senator and Vice Presidential candidate John Edwards. First his son makes fun of other, less privileged children for buying their shoes at Wal-Mart (god forbid!), but then he has his aide call their local Wally and ask to cut in line to be assured a PS3. (Seriously, he's not in office anymore, why the hell does he even need an aide?) Turning lemons into lemonade, Wal-Mart has issued a press release both praising Edwards' selection for a retailer, and chiding his selfishness: "... and while the rest of America's working families are waiting patiently in line, Senator Edwards wants to cut to the front. While, we cannot guarantee that Sen. Edwards will be among one of the first to obtain a PlayStation3, we are certain Sen. Edwards will be able to find great gifts for everyone on his Christmas list..." There, you want someone to riot on? You've got your man.

Yes, THAT John Edwards. You know, the one that ran with John F'n Kerry in 2004. I love democrats.

EDIT: Check out the bid history on that PS3. Somebody bid it up to $99,000,000, effectively killing the auction. BUT, before that, several people bid OVER A MILLION DOLLARS on this thing. Fascinating.

Disturbing Review of Happy Feet

Over at AintItCoolNews, Massawyrm (arguable the best reviewer AICN has) has posted a review of the new "family" penguin movie Happy Feet. Well, apparently the previews and trailers are lying to us. It's really a movie about the evils of religion and humans. You really need to read it. I know most of my readers don't have children, but it's important to know anyway. Here's an excerpt:

So my advice to those of you who are taking your kids anyway, prepare yourself for some questions. Be ready to explain the difference between faith and dogma when your kid asks why the parents wouldn’t believe Mumble about the aliens and why God said Mumble was bad for dancing. Prepare yourself to answer why it’s bad for all the big dumb predators to try and eat the penguins, but good for the penguins to chase down and kill schools of fish (I can help you with this one. The answer is: because the fish can’t speak, sing or dance – and human nature prevents us from killing or eating anything we consider to be adorable. It’s called Leary’s Law.) And finally, try to come up with an answer as to why it’s okay for the penguins to eat all the fish, but not for us to. Good luck with that one. Try Googling PETA and “Fish Are People Too.” I’m sure they have plenty of great material on the topic.

Oh, and BIG CONTENT WARNING. Massawyrm likes the F-bomb. You can tell when he's worked up, because it becomes very plentiful. Fair warning.

SWEET FANCY MOSES!!!!

This is AMAZING! This kid is playing an arrangement of Pachelbel's Canon in D, and it will ROCK YOUR FACE. The kid's probably 13 or so, and boy, does he have talent! Only a few extremely minor flubs, but good GAWD, I wish I could play like that. Listen to it LOOOOOUUUUUD!!!



EDIT: OK, the kids name is Lim Jeong Hyun (funtwo), and he's actually 25. The interesting thing is, he's doing an arrangement by a guy named JerryC (Jerry Chang), who ALSO has a video on YouTube. The two performances are very similar, but you can definitely tell a difference. Funtwo's is a little better technically (the runs and arpeggios are a bit cleaner), but JerryC's has a little more "heart". Personally, I like funtwo's a little better, but they're both outstanding. Here's the original. Enjoy!

Whoa, Didn't See That One Comin': Rumsfeld Out

From the AP:

Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld stepped down as defense secretary on Wednesday, one day after midterm elections in which opposition to the war in Iraq contributed to heavy Republican losses.

The man replacing him, Robert Gates, was a former CIA director and is the current president of Texas A&M University.

You know, just spit-ballin' here, wouldn't the smart thing to do would've been to do this, I don't know, before the election? Seeing as Rumsfeld was so unpopular and all that. Just sayin'.

The Most Important Issue

Found this over at RealClearPolitics. It's by Orson Scott Card, the acclaimed science-fiction author, and it addresses the most important issue on this election day, the War on Terror. Note, he's a democrat, for what it's worth. Really a great article. It's long, but you really need to read the whole thing.

Because even more than they fear terrorist bombs, the pro-democracy forces within Iraq and Afghanistan fear American withdrawal. Every speech threatening withdrawal is a bomb going off in Baghdad, killing, not people, but the will to resist the tyrants.

Bin Laden predicted it. The Democratic Party in America is following his script exactly.

It's Election Day!

VOTE! Or P-Diddy will kill you!

Dead Man Walkin'!

Sentenced to hang by the neck until dead, dead, dead! (Bonus points if you can name the movie reference.) Saddam Hussein has been found guilty of crimes against humanity, and has been sentenced to death. Of course, the spineless, gutless EU says, "Please don't execute him! Whhhaaaaa!"

Ar Troops R Awsum!

In response to John "F'n" Kerry's recent remarks that:

“You know, education, if you make the most of it, if you study hard and you do your homework, and you make an effort to be smart, uh, you, you can do well. If you don’t, you get stuck in Iraq.”

Our troops made this banner:



And the rumor is, this unit is stationed in Afghanistan! If so, that brings the funny to a whole new level! Gold!