Wednesday, August 30, 2006

It's my BIRFDAY!!

Greetings Humans!

For those that do not know me, I am known as Kaiser. BEHOLD! My birthday is at hand! A time for celebration, and more importantly, CAKE! I am 1 human year old today. And thus, I am smarter than all of you. Enough talking! It is time for presents!!!

Monday, August 28, 2006

Thought of the Day

Got this from Libertas:

Why is Wal-Mart evil for popping up everywhere and putting it’s competitors out of business but not Starbucks? I’ve done it: I’ve slammed evil corporate America while holding a Starbucks double latte, but it feels… Oh, I don’t know… Hypocritical?

I'll let you stew on that for a bit.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Hellboy 2 Script Review

Apparently, this is going to be freakin' awesome! I was a YOOOOGE fan of the first one, but thought it ended kind of abruptly. The whole Hellboy franchise is extremely cool (not to mention, it'll preach), and this sequel looks like it should improve on the first in every way. Love me some Ron Perlman. Anyway, here's some excerpts(via

It’s taken a couple of years, but Guillermo del Toro’s adaptation of Mike
Mignola’s comic book Hellboy is finally getting a sequel, and this time the
movie really ups the ante. The opening pages of the script
feature more action than most movies this year – and that’s before the credits

...When a Manhattan auction house is attacked by a sword-wielding elf and a troll, the event serves as Hellboy’s coming out party. While battling a flesh eating mass of tooth fairies – they’re creepier than they sound! – Hellboy manages to take the fight to a crowd of reporters, where he and the BPRD are completely outed. Cue the opening credits!

Loved this part:

Being public brings new problems to the team as they deal with autograph hounds, hate mail and an appearance on Jay Leno.

Can't wait!

Friday, August 18, 2006

Snakes On A %@#$@& Plane!

Oh yes, Snakes On a Plane is out. It's Sam Jackson at his butt-kickin' best. A movie with little to no plot, a cheesy premise, and the BEST FREAKIN' TITLE EVER!!! It is what it is, you know? Part spoof, part action, part horror, part comedy, all SAM JACKSON! Oh, and the premier at the Alamo Drafthouse in Austin had LIVE RATTLESNAKES in the THEATRE while the movie was playing. Sweet! Can't wait to see it!

UPDATE: Snakes on a plane has now made the Urban Dictionary. The first definition (language warning):

A simple existential observation that has the same meaning as "Whaddya gonna do?" or "Shit Happens". Taken from the upcoming Samuel L. Jackson movie of the same name, and immortilised by screenwriter Josh Friedman on his blog post of Wednesday, August 17, 2005.

Guy 1: (irate) Dude, you just ran into the back of my SUV!

Guy 2: (calm) Snakes on a plane man. Snakes on a plane.
I think the world just became a better place.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Everything You Know Is Wrong

OK, maybe not EVERYTHING, but at least one of the staples of elementary school.


The tally of planets in our solar system would jump instantly to a dozen under a highly controversial new definition proposed by the International Astronomical Union (IAU).

The proposal, which sources tell is gaining broad support, tries to plug a big gap in astronomy textbooks, which have never had a definition for the word "planet." It addresses discoveries of Pluto-sized worlds that have in recent years pitched astronomers into heated debates over terminology.
The asteroid Ceres, which is round, would be recast as a dwarf planet in the new scheme.
Pluto would remain a planet and its moon Charon would be reclassified as a planet. Both would be called "plutons," however, to distinguish them from the eight "classical" planets.
A far-out Pluto-sized object known as 2003 UB313 would also be called a pluton.

So, we've now got at least 12 planets. Maybe as many as 53. Pretty cool. I do have to point out at least one stupidity: They're making Ceres the sole member of a planet sub-class called "dwarf planets". Hookaaay, why not just call it an asteroid?! I remain confused. Whatev. Go science guys, it's your birthday!

Monday, August 14, 2006

My Anniversary Present Came!

Well, it finally arrived. It's super cool, and much prettier in person than in these pictures. Anyway, it's a Spanish La Caruna FR-8 bolt-action rifle, chambered in 7.62x51mm. They're actually pretty dang rare, and are one of the few rifles that most people put in the "never sell, never trade" category. Luckily for me, someone else didn't subscribe to that theory. A few pics:

Here's a little blurb from

Okay…so it looked strange, but it looked INTRIGUING. So off to the World Wide Web I went.

Turns out that the FR-8 is exactly as I thought, a half 20th and half 19th century rifle (sort of). Back in the 1950’s, the Spanish government was working with CETME (Centro de Estudios Tecnicos de Materiales Especiales or center for the study of technical materials) to develop an assault rifle for its armies. German weapons designers working with CETME developed the so called CETME assault rifle, which was later to become the G3 rifle for the German army...

So, Spain was in the process of implementing the CETME assault rifle, but there were not enough of the new assault rifles around for issue and training. They did, however, have gobs of old Mauser bolt actions (1916 and 1943 models). They developed a rifle that not only could be used to arm non combatant and “Guardia Civil” troops, but also would fill the gap in training purposes until more CETME assault rifles were on line. Hence, the FR-7/FR-8 was born.

A more in-depth article here.

Thanks, MissSpeech! Love you!

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Awesome Short Film, Check It Out Now!

Alive In Joburg, a stellar short film directed by Neill Blomkamp, is an eerie tale of the arrival of aliens in Johannesburg, South Africa. It's done in a documentary style, and is absolutely fascinating. Instead of an invasion, the aliens quickly become the victims of rampant discrimination, and are forced to live in slums. It's really an amazing little film. It's extremely well done. Let me know what you think.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

This Gives Me the Heebie Jeebies

And I'm not sure why. I guess it's how perfect it is. Maybe it's the hugeness. From the Hubblesite:

At a relatively bright magnitude of +8, M104 is just beyond the limit of naked-eye visibility and is easily seen through small telescopes. The Sombrero lies at the southern edge of the rich Virgo cluster of galaxies and is one of the most massive objects in that group, equivalent to 800 billion suns. The galaxy is 50,000 light-years across and is located 28 million light-years from Earth.

In normal people terms, it's 164,597,987,751,531,050,000 MILES AWAY, and 293,924,978,127,734,000 MILES ACROSS!!!.

Remember, this isn't a computer generated image or anything. It's a PHOTOGRAPH. And people say there is no God. Hmph.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

I Think This Makes Me Sad

Saw this on Fark, and just had to bring it to your attention. Anyway, it's called the Great John, and it's a toilet for "large" people. From the site:

To insure STURDINESS, we also added reinforcements into the base. Our toilets are tested to 2000 lb. To eliminate the problem of the SEAT SLIDING, we provide "Anti-Side" fins for safety. This also prevents pinching. Finally, GJ has added a second SET OF ANCHORS at the front sides of the base to increase protection against movement of the unit from the floor.

2000lbs? Sweet, fancy Moses. That's a substantial toilet. America truely is the greatest nation on earth!

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Somebody Get That Girl A Sedative!

My sister-in-law, everybody. We're so proud! Love you, J-dub!