Tuesday, November 06, 2007

England Is Broken

Recently, UKTV ran a poll on the most asinine laws in the UK. Here's the results, with the top 10 dumbest international laws added at the end.

The UK's top 10 most ridiculous British laws were listed as:

1. It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament (27%)--One wonders how you would enforce this.

2. It is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British king or queen's image upside-down (7%)--We are not amused.

3. It is illegal for a woman to be topless in Liverpool except as a clerk in a tropical fish store (6%)--This makes perfect sense to the GreatMoose, as who else would NEED to be topless in Liverpool?

4. Eating mince pies on Christmas Day is banned(5%)--Shouldn't that be banned, well, every day?

5. If someone knocks on your door in Scotland and requires the use of your toilet, you are required to let them enter (4%)--Not unreasonable, sometimes you GOT to go.

6. In the UK a pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants, including in a policeman's helmet (4%)--The GreatMoose finds this one particularly amusing, as clearly there's a reason for the constable's headware to be mentioned.

7. The head of any dead whale found on the British coast automatically becomes the property of the King, and the tail of the Queen (3.5%)Ah, the Queen's sporting a "whale tail". I think I'm sad now.

8. It is illegal not to tell the tax man anything you do not want him to know, but legal not to tell him information you do not mind him knowing (3%)Crayon's are good food.

9. It is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament wearing a suit of armour--Pbbbbtt! I'll wear my armour anywhere I feel like it!

10. It is legal to murder a Scotsman within the ancient city walls of York, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow (2%)--WHAT?! It's not legal to murder a Scotsman no matter what? Excuse me, I have to go run an errand...

The top 10 bizarre foreign laws as voted by those polled:

1. In Ohio, it is illegal to get a fish drunk (9%)As it should be. No means no.
2. In Indonesia, the penalty for masturbation is decapitation (8%)That's no..er...nevermind.

3. A male doctor in Bahrain can only examine the genitals of a woman in the reflection of a mirror (7%)--Why does that not suprise me?

4. In Switzerland, a man may not relieve himself standing up after 10pm (6%)Now THAT'S a good law. Friggin' Swiss...

5. It is illegal to be blindfolded while driving a vehicle in Alabama (6%)Do they have cars in Alabama?

6. In Florida, unmarried women who parachute on a Sunday could be jailed (6%)I can see how that would be a problem.

7. Women in Vermont must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth (6%)Barefoot and pregnant, baby...

8. In Milan, it is a legal requirement to smile at all times, except during funerals or hospital visits (5%)I LOL'd

9. There is no age of consent in Japan (5%)Ummm, so all sex is rape, or am I reading that wrong?

10. In France, it is illegal to name a pig Napoleon (4%)Le couchon, le couchon!


Joshua "Doc" Wible said...

Incredible. Im at a complete loss.

JTapp said...


You know, in Lexington it's illegal to carry an ice cream cone in your back pocket.