So you've probably heard of Miley Montana, er... Hannah Cyrus, er... Billy Ray Von Mullet's daughter's somewhat questionable decision to have a photoshoot in Vanity Fair. Hoopedy-doo. What you may not know is so many people went to VanityFair.com to look at the photos, that VanityFair's webserver crashed, and that because of that, America is filled with pedophiles. And of course, nobody cares. I give you the thought process here:
Media: In case you didn't know, Vanity Fair has slightly risque pictures of Hannah Montana star Miley Cyrus. She's only fifteen, it's terrible.
Public: Um... okay whatever.
Media: They're terrible. Racy, filthy pictures. She's only fifteen and you can see her bare back. In Vanity Fair.
Public: We have more important things to worry about.
Media: These pictures are disgraceful. No one should look at them. Here are what they look like, in full-screen on your television. You can see these pictures at VanityFair.com or in this month's issue on newsstands today, but don't because they pictures are terrible.
Public: Well, now we're just curious.
Media: You people are pedophiles! Looking at these sexual pictures of a fifteen-year-old on VanityFair.com and in the magazine on newsstands now. What has society come to that people are so obsessed with the actions of celebrities. She's only fifteen, leave her alone. Don't look at the picture we're showing to the left of the anchorperson's head right now. Don't look at it! Society is coming to a screeching halt! You should all be ashamed for looking at these shameful pictures in this month's issue of Vanity Fair, on newsstands today or on VanityFair.com. Shame!
Manufactured outrage, much? Raise your hand if you give a flying fart in the wind about any of this. That's what I thought.