Tuesday, April 29, 2008

So, Apparently We're All Pedos

So you've probably heard of Miley Montana, er... Hannah Cyrus, er... Billy Ray Von Mullet's daughter's somewhat questionable decision to have a photoshoot in Vanity Fair. Hoopedy-doo. What you may not know is so many people went to VanityFair.com to look at the photos, that VanityFair's webserver crashed, and that because of that, America is filled with pedophiles. And of course, nobody cares. I give you the thought process here:

Media: In case you didn't know, Vanity Fair has slightly risque pictures of Hannah Montana star Miley Cyrus. She's only fifteen, it's terrible.

Public: Um... okay whatever.

Media: They're terrible. Racy, filthy pictures. She's only fifteen and you can see her bare back. In Vanity Fair.

Public: We have more important things to worry about.

Media: These pictures are disgraceful. No one should look at them. Here are what they look like, in full-screen on your television. You can see these pictures at VanityFair.com or in this month's issue on newsstands today, but don't because they pictures are terrible.

Public: Well, now we're just curious.

Media: You people are pedophiles! Looking at these sexual pictures of a fifteen-year-old on VanityFair.com and in the magazine on newsstands now. What has society come to that people are so obsessed with the actions of celebrities. She's only fifteen, leave her alone. Don't look at the picture we're showing to the left of the anchorperson's head right now. Don't look at it! Society is coming to a screeching halt! You should all be ashamed for looking at these shameful pictures in this month's issue of Vanity Fair, on newsstands today or on VanityFair.com. Shame!

Manufactured outrage, much? Raise your hand if you give a flying fart in the wind about any of this. That's what I thought.

10 comments:

JTapp said...

You hit the nail on the head with this one. America was already pedophiles after so much attention the Spears daughters got.

What's sad is that all their parents are outspoken Christians. Being a Christian has come to mean that you have serious psychological issues in your family.

JTapp said...

Your post got me thinking, and a quick search figured it out:
The media promotes the Vanity Fair story because much of the media is owned by the same company that owns Vanity Fair.

Advance Publications.

Pretty much any entertainment news story is hyped by a news media owned by company that also owns the channel you can find the entertainer on.

This is where (sadly, ironically) the Brits actually have a good thing with state-funded media like the BBC. They actually get real news instead of pure crap.

Joshua "Doc" Wible said...

Spamma Wyomings bare back! Yahoo! Where can I print it at poster size?!

Greatmoose said...

You're a pedo.

Greatmoose said...

JTAPP: That's the truth. There's something to be said for state-run media. On the other hand, there's lots of bad to go with it. Oh and this: "Being a Christian has come to mean that you have serious psychological issues in your family." is the freakin' Gospel truth. Ugh.

Anonymous said...

Actually i do give a fart about it. Miley Cyrus has expressed that she is a Christian many times to the media...that's great. but where do you draw the line for integrity when a situation like this occurs? granted, she was not totally naked, but there are some questionable pictures.

It just frustrates me when high profile people flaunt their Christianity...i mean, Miley is literally the hottest star right now. So when things like this happen, don't you think it makes "non-Christians" question the behavior of those who are Christians?

j

Anonymous said...

greatmoose, will i get a response out of you on my thoughts?

j

Greatmoose said...

I tend to agree, for the most part. I think that's why when most people hear that so-and-so is a Christian, they just roll thier eyes. And why Christians in general are met with such hostility.

Greatmoose said...

Having said that, so many people have such different ideas about what "being a Christian" means, it really doesn't mean a whole lot when I hear "Miley Cyrus is a Christian." So what? What does that mean (if anything) to HER? Perhaps it's me being cynical, but I find it increasingly hard to care when a famous person says they're a Christian.

Anonymous said...

true, i think that even if you have a room full of Christians together, there will be SO many different views on such things as drinking, debt, modesty, cussing, giving...those are a few that come to mind. i find that it's very easy to be cynical and jaded when you assume that everyone should have the exact same views as you do, but then you find out that people don't think the same way.
it's just frustating when someone that is in the public eye says they are a Christian...i think it makes everyone watch their every move more closely and assume that every action they take will be holy and pure.

makes me wonder how God does it?! geez, there are so many people with so many different traits and personalities and ideas on what being a Christian is supposed to be like...and yet, He created us all!!!!!!!!

j